WITTY v/s REALITY

We have often looked at certain phrases which have traversed our lives in the recent past. If we had to lock them with few instances as Wit v/s Reality then I guess this is how it goes:

1. Nirbhaya Insulted by Lawyers

Now we have often heard about our advocates not just being mere lawmakers but also the guardians to the justified humane activities in the world. But when the Defense Lawyers, M L Sharma and A P Singh, who represented the Rape convicts in the Nirbhaya case (which was already a blunder in itself), turned up with a bunch of demeaning statements (in the most illegible English spoken ever) targetting the females in society on the controversial BBC documentary by British journalist, Leslee Udwin. This is when we say:

Ninety-Nine percent of Lawyers give the rest a bad name

rape lawyers

2. Anonymous Letter threatens to Blow up Odisha Assembly

Just as people saw, Mr.Naveen Patnaik, the Chief Minister of Odisha (hope I have got this right), was battling the crisis of shortage of consumer resources in his state, his government received a shot in the arm as there was an “Anonymous Letter” which reached the State Secretariat threatening to blow its assembly to pieces. However, it turned out to be fatal but certainly raises issues of security in the state. Hence comes the saying:

Never answer an Anonymous Letter

orissaassemblyruckus295

3. A K Hangal’s funeral boycotted

Veteran Actor, A K Hangal who almost struggled through his last days of life without being able to fulfill his medical bills properly (atleast that was reported by few in the media) when passed away to eternal silence, sadly none from the fraternity came forward to seek answers to the famous question “Itna Sannata Kyu Hai Bhai?” from the actor who gave that dialogue the required edge. But history has it that, Late Mr.Hangal never attended funerals of any of his colleagues. If that were to be true then this is all we can say:

Always go to other people’s funerals, or else they won’t go to yours

a k hangal

4. Navjot Singh Sidhu and his Laughter Challenge

When Former Indian Cricketer-turned-Parliamentarian, Mr.Navjot Singh Sidhu, was offered to judge a comedy show few years ago, then many in the cricketing and non-cricketing circuit were taken aback (thanks to his ‘Angry Young Sardar’ reputation which he carried for years on the cricket field). But as time has passed by since the first edition of Laughter Challenge came on Television and to this day when he still features on a comedy show (read Comedy Nights With Kapil), Sidhu Paaji (as he is affectionately called) can utter a “shayari” and burst out laughing at the drop of a hat (or rather his Turban, sorry for the pun all Sardars). Now this is why we say:

He who laughs last thinks the slowest

Comedy-Nights-with-Kapil-Navjot-singh-Sidhu-e1411036807997

5. Beef Ban Bill Passed

As the Saffron brigade came to power in Maharashtra, one their primary agenda was to slam a ban on Cow Slaughter. This ban definitely rubbed against the 29% of Beef-eating population in the state. Though they say “eat as you please but wear what the world wants”, here the theory was defied. Hence many non-vegetarian eating population posed this question:

If we weren’t supposed to be eating animals, why are they made with meat?

beef ban

6. Prayer Assembly in Schools

Though this could be out of turn for the above discussed points, this still holds true to current scene where almost every kid is writing some exam in their own grades. Its Exam Season. Though the world celebrates 5 seasons, i.e., Spring,Summer,Monsoon,Autumn and Winter. Its only in the students life that you have 6 seasons where Exams are also an addition to the former list. As we all know all the spirituality in a kid comes to fore during exams.But as usual the God is still confused whether to save the kids or the teachers. Hence we can say:

As long as there are exams, there will be prayer in schools

school prayer

7. Alia Bhatt and her Intelligence

Though the name of the show suggests that a lot can happen over a cup of coffee, Filmmaker-TV show Host Karan Johar’s last edition of Koffee with Karan certianly this time did spill beans of most celebrities. Though this time the show made headlines for several reasons including the conspicuous absence of his dear friend and superstar Shah Rukh Khan a.k.a SRK and instead opening the show with his supposed arch-rival and friends-turned-foes-turned-friends (ok, lets say, It’s Complicated) Salman Khan and the presence of Akshay Kumar (who made his debut on a chat show after being in the industry for over 20 years) and the other Khan also making his presence felt for the 1st time on Karan’s show Mr.PK (Perfectionist Khan) Aamir Khan.However, amidst all this chaotic celeb affair the show-stealer were none of these old wines but a new bottle. Yes….If you don’t know, who she is then you could also make news for it. You guessed it right, the last surviving soldier in the battle for Intelligence was the little, pretty looking actress who was on the show flanked by her co-stars Varun Dhawan and Siddharth Malhotra, definitely didn’t qualify to be the Student of the Year, Alia Bhatt. Post the show, she almost became butt of all jokes. Most comedians and mobile service providers, made their living on her name and her intelligence for a while. After looking at her answers this is what few had to say:

 You took an IQ test, and the results were negative

alia36

So, now you realize that Reality is the source of every Wit shot in the world.

(PS: All above mentioned are intended in good humour and doesn’t relate co-incidentally to anybody living or dead.)

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